Sometimes it makes me wonder why I threw away my life for a bunch of people who would turn out to be ingrates! Nakakainis lang! It just feels like I sacrificed for nothing! I am not asking for anything in return for myself. I asked them to at least take over some of my responsibilities by the time they graduate. But look where I am now! Still the breadwinner. Still the one paying for most of the bills and taking care of the house. I wouldn’t be complaining/ranting like this if I didn’t hear something bad from one of them. Imagine calling me names!
I still feel like crying hours after it happened. I cannot believe hearing it. I took care of everyone and this is what I get out of all my sacrifices?!?
Just makes me so angry with everyone right now!
A friend of mine told me that she uses an alesis io dock for her iPad so she can listen to the playlists she has there. She has a very eclectic taste in music so she doesn’t tune in to local radio stations as much. She loves listening to her choice songs especially late at night when she is at her creative best!
She paints, sketches, draws. She does it manually and digitally. Late at night is when she does her best work, when everyone is already fast asleep and it’s relatively quiet around the house.
Her iPad is her companion and the music coming from it.
I’ve been going back and forth between staying put in the house we’ve been living in for the past three decades and moving out to relocate somewhere else.
When it’s sunny and the neighbors are cooperating (read: peaceful and quiet), I want to stay put. We have a modest home and I know with revonations and fixes we could make this a better place for us to live in. But when it’s raining so hard and the walls are leaking a bit or when the neighbors are their usual loud, obnoxious selves, I want to run away and never come back!
I love our house. We own it and we’ve been here since we were little kids and the neighbors were far and few between. But two, three neighbors came from far away, built houses resembling pigeon holes, and made making babies their way of life! Now there are neighbors that we don’t know; mostly renters of the neighbors. Rooms would sprout out of nowhere! A roof would be replaced by flooring where a new room will be built for new renters or additional members of the family to occupy. You’d think our neighborhood is filled with squatters/illegal occupants! Actually, that’s the initial impression of those who don’t know our area.
It would be really nice to find a new home. What I just dread is finding out that the place will be submerged in flood waters in a heavy downpour. Our area never experienced flooding even during the super typhoon Ondoy. And we’re in the middle of all the action in the city and the neighboring ones. But we also have to think of the strangers around the neighborhood, the likeliness of a fire burning down all the houses including ours (due to the fact that houses here are built one after another with no firewalls in between), and the stress caused by so much noise made on special occasions and fights. There’s also the problem with too much dust around!
I really pray everything will fall into place this year. We need a new home in a quiet and safe neighborhood with no possibility of being submerged in flood waters. Please…
My younger cousin has a school allowance the same as a minimum salary per day of an ordinary office worker. I was surprised to learn about it and was initially frowning upon my aunt’s decision to let my cousin handle such an amount of money. I didn’t want my cousin to lose her sense of hard work to earn her keep but when I thought about it, I somehow understood where my aunt’s coming from.
My dad and his siblings grew up in a poor family. Being a large family can really have its drawbacks and one of those things is to have enough to share with each other. My aunt, seeing as she now has more than enough to give to her only daughter, was giving her everything that she can give. But my aunt told me that luckily my cousin knows how to handle her money. She proudly told me that my cousin is saving her extra allowance for things she wants to buy for herself. I saw a brand new lap steel guitar in my cousin’s room. One of the fruits of the extra allowance she has in her savings.
I really need to be in a beautiful place just to rest. I want to be there and not to anything but stare at the scenery surrounding me. I want to be under the sun while reading a book or under the stars while dreaming or shaping ideas in my head.
I just need to be away for a while… from everything!
It will do me a whole lot of good for sure.
My sister is working for a company undergoing a business expansion right now. She is tasked to handle the hiring of additional employees. She has a set of blank job application ready for those who will be walking in to apply for any job post open.
She is very much excited for the expansion. Her boss told her that she will be handling one department for the expansion and she can’t wait to take on that challenge. She is ready for new things in her career and this is what she’s been looking forward to ever since she got hired in this company she’s now working for.
These past few days I’ve always been so sleepy. It seems to me that the longer I sleep, the more I crave it. Good thing I’ve done most of the stuff I needed to do online or I would have been in trouble for sure.
My theory is that the past is catching up with me. Seven years ago, I get a maximum of three hours of sleep every single day. On most Sundays I would get around four hours of sleep but that’s not in successive hours. I would get two or three hours of sleep after work around five or six in the morning and then an hour of nap around two in the afternoon. That’s it. And now I know I am paying for those years I’ve neglected myself.
But I’ve no regrets. Those first few years of online work have been the best ever!
Missy would like to believe that she now has stronger faith than in the past. She has doubts, yes. She has trust issues at times, yes. But the love she has for her Creator and the faith she has are things she holds on to.
She talks to the parish priest about her doubts and trust issues from time to time. She is working out on getting it out of her system. Slowly but surely. She is taking every step to become better in her faith.
Now, she’s off to buy church chairs for the local parish as her donation to it.